Sunday, November 23, 2014

Topical Monologue Jokes That Should Be Deported


A Great Dane in Pennsylvania has given birth to 19 puppies. "Game on!" said Octomom.

NBC has cancelled its planned sitcom with Bill Cosby due to allegations of sexual assault against the comedian. Though reports say Cosby is pitching a new show to networks called "My Accusers Say the Darndest Things".

Facebook is developing a new website that people can use for work. "One step ahead of you," said people already using Facebook at work.

The Bob Marley estate has created a line of official Bob Marley marijuana that will soon hit the market. Sources say you'll be able to tell you're smoking official Bob Marley marijuana if you were overcharged for regular marijuana.

According to a new survey, the world's favorite country is Germany. While the world's least favorite country is Germany from 1939.

Video taken by scientists in the Antarctic shows seals forcing penguins to have sex with them. Even worse, the seals then make the penguins do the waddle of shame.

According to a new study, women with larger breasts tend to spend more money. More specifically, they tend to spend more of someone else's money.

U2 is releasing a series of short films inspired by their new album. It's mostly footage of people deleting the album from their iTunes.

Beyonce's sister Solange got married last weekend. And as you probably guessed, even at her own wedding she was still the bridesmaid.

Charles Manson has gotten a license to marry a 26-year-old woman who visits him in prison. Though the move has been criticized by those trying to protect the sanctity of murder.

In the midst of Buffalo, New York's massive snow storm, several men were seen looting from an abandoned Doritos truck. However the only flavor in the truck was waaay too cool ranch.

The North Korean news agency published photos of Kim Jong Un visiting a food factory. Or as most people call it, a kennel.

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